As Good As Dead - Chapter 38

I heard their hearts beating from the other side of the temple door. The sounds were soft and pulsing in hurried tempos. Each heartbeat had its own cadence, matching their owner’s excitement or fear. But there were so many I couldn’t get an accurate count.

So, I used Hide, waiting in the doorway’s shadow with my bastard sword drawn until I disappeared. From my bone necklace, I channeled the skill to use the weapon.

Whoever they were, they didn’t make a sound. My hearing was exceptional; far better than it had been when I was alive. Without Hear Heartbeat, I’d have never known they were waiting.

Minutes dragged on, and I sat perfectly still in the darkness. It was unbearable.

I wanted them to hurry and get the ambush going. Because the longer I waited, the more I had time to think about Mizrah and her selfish act. What she’d done to poor Rissah had hit me harder than I thought it would. My usual jokes weren’t easing the discomfort nesting in my heart, and I didn’t have to look too hard to find the source.

Rissah’s situation had reminded me too much of my own. The handmaiden had sat trapped in her own body, unable to do anything but be a witness to her own trauma. That beings in this world could inflict that kind of horror on others filled me with an existential dread that I thought I was long incapable of experiencing again. In a world with magic and immortality, that was what she did with all of her power?

I had to will my hand not to clench, as my fragmented thoughts drifted between indulgent revenge fantasies. If I’d had a heart, it would have been pounding every bit as loud as the people waiting for me.

I know now for a certainty that hell is a real place, and I hope you suffer for all eternity Mizrah, you witch.

My fear made me angry, and I didn’t like it. Scar tissue, even the emotional kind, cut open way too quickly. I knew I would do whatever I could to avoid such a fate, but the only solution I could think of was to get stronger. Which was a conundrum. If I spent all my time working to get stronger, then I wouldn’t really be living. There was a balance I needed to find.

Lost in rumination, I nearly missed the door cracking open an inch.

Finally, the distraction I needed.

A red-colored eye peered through the slender opening, passing over my location without a hint of recognition. Large taloned hands slipped around the door’s edge and pried open the space ever so slowly.

The nonhuman creature was doing its best to be as quiet as possible, and made me think it wasn’t a monster. There was a level of planning here beyond that of a bloodthirsty creature.

I got my first good look at one of the beings that had come for me. It was nearly as tall as I was, at close to six feet, with a lanky frame covered in black fur. Besides the red eyes, the humanoid had a near perfect representation of a bat’s head. The only difference being a prickly row of spikes where a man’s eyebrows would be. Rough animal hides covered its torso and legs, but otherwise, the thing was naked. On the metaphysical level, I could sense that its mana was close to mine, if slightly weaker.

Bat people? Why couldn’t it be sexy fox girls that were 99% human except for the ears?

The mystery creature might not have been able to see me, but I could tell by the narrowed eyes it knew something was up. The batman threw a sack on the ground, then backed out of the door like they’d tossed an explosive. I almost broke my cover to do the same thing, but a buzzing sound stopped me in my tracks.

Insects.

A huge swarm of hornet like creatures the size of my fist tore out of an opening in the bag. They were all white, save for a black skull looking symbol that mother nature had painted on the bastards back in warning.

I thought they wouldn’t be able to sense me, hidden as I was with my trait, but I was wrong. My ever-growing power had extended the aura of Verminbane, and as soon as the nasty wasps caught a whiff, they went into a frenzy. Half flew down the tunnel to the pit, and the other half went back the way the bat dude went.

The sudden flurry of clicking and chirping from the panicked bat people nearly made me guffaw.

Knowing the jig was up, the one that had thrown the trap stepped through the opening with a black spear in its hands.

Nice, I need a new spear. I lost mine when I set it down fighting those ghouls.

The insects had covered its face and ears in red welts, and its snarling mouth spoke of fury. My enchanted blade ripped through the creature’s torso so fast it was dead before it hit the ground. Black blood spilled out of the hole, corrupted from my Ambush Predator trait exploding necrotic energy into its body.

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I tried to step back into the shadow, but the burning component of my enchanted weapon had set the fur of the ugly creature on fire.

The door to either side flung open, and I saw no less than ten of the creatures waiting for me with spears raised. With them being so packed in together, I thought it was the perfect time to use Poisonous Gas.

I was sort of right.

Green fog rolled out in a spreading blanket, causing many of the creatures to rear back. The ones that weren’t so fortunate immediately began coughing. However, what I hadn’t counted on was the gas catching on fire.

As soon as the tail end of my bad breath went low enough to touch the batman I’d set on fire, the entire gas cloud fucking exploded.

The force sent me and Handrew Dice Clay rolling backward on the ground. Disoriented as I was, I couldn’t tell exactly how far I flew, but I knew for sure that I was glad I couldn’t get concussions any longer.

With my feet under me again, I charged forward, reasoning that I would recover much faster than the living. Burning bodies littered the outside of the temple and their smoking forms obscured the survivors from sight. But I didn’t need to see them. Their heartbeats, which were much fewer now, did that for me.

I leapt through the smoke, swinging my blade like I was fighting for Scottish independence. The first stroke split another bat person’s head open, spraying blood and setting the skull on fire. As much as I wanted to stop and appreciate how metal that was, I instead did a pivot to block an oncoming spear. My parry chopped the spear in half, and my follow through stab went right into the creature’s shoulder with the slightest resistance.

The ugly bat nearly surprised me, letting out a high-pitched, foul smelling wail that sounded like a human baby crying. Weaponless and in pain, my opponent had no defense when I kicked it in the chest. My superior strength and weight hurled it backward, off the platform and down the steps of the ziggurat. The magical flames ignited and by the time it was halfway down the edifice, the anthropomorphic bat was fully on fire.

Stop, drop, and roll my ass.

Another spear came at my right flank, grazing across my leather armor before I could react. Without the ability to sense pain, I couldn’t tell how far it had penetrated, but I didn’t let that concern me.

I turned to the latest applicant of the “Who wants to die horribly” corporation and saw that they were a smaller female of their species. Sadly for them, I was an equal opportunity employer. My Enhanced Agility carried me to the side of the attacker, and I stabbed them through the neck. Roasting blood steamed out of both holes, stimulating me to rip the blade away in disgust. Unfortunately, the cooking bats smelled like fried chicken.

One heartbeat remained, and it was beating so fast I could probably track it for a mile. The creature turned to flee down the steps of the temple, but I caught it with little effort. A lunging thrust through the chest, turned the coward into a shish ka-bat.

The mana from all the deaths had been substantial, but I resisted the urge to check my codex. I picked up a spear from a nearby corpse, then set about searching for evidence of where they’d come from.

Taking the steps three at a time, I ran to the top of the temple to get a look over the entire necropolis. What I found was a rope made of moss dangling from the ceiling.

The location clued me in to a potential explanation for an ancient crime.

Ah, I get it. Poor Caspian probably came up here to do what I’m doing now, and they got the jump on him from above. People never look up, as they say. All the holes in his back and neck were from spears. These things are excellent ambushers, so he probably never even knew what hit him.

Though I couldn’t detect any heartbeats above me, I wasn’t stupid enough to sit and die like Caspian had. So, I went back to the interior of the temple, stepping around smoldering bodies and disoriented hornets. Once I was in the shadows again, I checked over the cut that I’d received. Thankfully, the spear hadn’t gone deep enough to break skin, but it left a nasty gash all the way down my leather breastplate’s right side. That settled, I remained still until Hide enveloped me again. Only then did I risk closing my eyes to check the Naram-Sin.

You have sufficient mana to advance a tier I → II

Please choose a level 5 spell. Refusal to pick a spell will eliminate the possibility of selecting new spells from the Tome of the Mad Prophet Derzalha at later levels.

• Bone Armor: Pulls together nearby bones to form a magical set of armor that protects the wearer.

• Cloud of Entropy: A draining mist rolls into an area, rotting all living things it touches.

• Name a Champion: A single minion under your control finds its abilities permanently increased. May evolve to develop new abilities. Cannot be reused until the minion is destroyed.

This was a moderately hard choice for me. Bone Armor sounded great, and I would have considered picking it if I hadn’t already been armored. There was definitely a case for stacking strengths in a particular area, but turning myself into skeletor the meat shield didn’t appeal to my aesthetics.

Cloud of Entropy was so amazing I had to restrain myself from taking it on the spot. It would have been incredible in the fight I’d just won. Any attack which could weaken my enemies or prohibit their movement to an area would be crucial for me surviving on my own. Getting surrounded by foes was a death sentence, and this would prevent that.

Then there was choice number three. I only had one minion left at present, but it was my closest friend. My confidant, and partner in crime. Even now, as I sat against the ancient brick of the temple hallway, I could feel my handy friend clutching the leather armor on my shoulder. Would I ever be able to look at it in the knuckles again if I bypassed this spell?

I knew that the cloud spell was the superior choice, but I couldn’t count on anything coming around a second time. The codex had already proven it was unpredictable and quirky. I’d never forgive myself if I let this go.

Mentally, I steeled myself, then selected Name a Champion.