Tunnel Rat - Chapter 332: Taking out the Trash
“Dammit, can’t a man just haul in his nets and land a catch anymore? We’ve already had bad weather, pirates, and exploding ships today, and now the seas are going mad.”
A nearby sailor heard their captain and ruefully added, “Aye, and paying too much in ‘protection money’ with no protection. Every damned Scavenger Captain wants a bit of tribute, the pirates still come at us, and we have to pay the Ogre to guard the docks. At least Pike does his job.”
“Oh, he does, and a little bit more. He didn’t have to go after those two ships, but he did and sent them to the bottom of the bay, burning as they went. That was an eerie sight I’d never expected to see.” Several sailors made signs to their gods, nodding in agreement. Drowning was a bad way to go, and fire was worse, but burning as you sank into the sea was especially gruesome.
“There are big critters out in the middle of the bay, Captain. Seems a shame to go through what we have and not make it into port.”
“Aye, signal the other ships to pull down most of their sail. We’ll keep up just enough to steer and creep along the outer edge and play it safe. We don’t want any part of whatever deviltry had been stirred up out there.”
As it turns out, the person responsible for stirring up the deviltry was wishing he could have avoided the situation altogether. Milo was getting the hang of skimming across the top of the water, but he wasn’t quick enough to totally avoid the eels. Too many of the small ones were coming from different directions, converging on his location and trying to make a snack out of him. He had his tail wrapped around his waist to avoid one of them snagging it and dragging him under.
Three times he’d had to leap and dodge larger eels and then scramble to regain his stride. Once, when one came directly at him, he’d managed to step on its snout and then run along its back before racing away across the water again.
And while his immediate problem was dodging eels and keeping his footing, ultimately, he had to decide where to go when he reached the shore. If he dodged over or around the tight-packed ships, he could make it to the shore and sprint into the city. His worry was the eels wouldn’t stop at the shoreline. They could do a lot of damage to the city and hurt a lot of people if they chased him through the streets or hunted people when they couldn’t catch him.
If he died, he’d be back after a few hours. People in the town didn’t have that option. But while he could simply stop running and die, he hated the thought of being killed by an eel. Worse, being eaten by them! There was also the problem of getting to a headstone that was sitting at the bottom of eel-infested waters.
But as he approached land, a third option occurred to him. Maybe he could use a bumper crop of eels and a proliferation of pirates to solve both problems at once.
Pike had given him a new perspective on the problem. According to the Ogre, Scavenger clans could devolve to piracy or pirates could work to become competent Scavengers. Mostly, they got worse, but some Captains had lofty goals. They may have fled traditional life in the dwarven holds for the adventure of the high seas, but they still wanted a competent crew and a sturdy ship. Scavengers, for all they complained about, Engineers were closer to them than they were to the pirates. Steam-powered submersibles and magi-tech equipment took a high level of skill to keep in repair or build in the first place. They had a disdain for the pirates in their wooden ships, similar to how the Engineers looked down upon anyone who couldn’t use a #9 Gangley wrench to adjust a subrogator.
The huge steamships of the Greater Clans were docked next to the city. Lesser scavenger clans and the pirates who had arrived next in the largest ships formed the next ring. From there, the area of the bay near Shadowport was clogged with smaller ships, large rafts, and strange floating contraptions made from several ships that were operating as gambling dens and bars. While the Greater Clans might engage in a little extortion to gain a barrel of fish or a little coin, it was the worst of the pirates that preyed on shipping, even going as far as to sink ships and kill some of the sailors. Those became Milo’s target as he neared the shore. But first, he needed a new look.
The Orca vibrated slightly as steam boilers went to full power and the guns revved up, ready to shoot. The mass of critters was still out of range of the steam guns, but the crew was sighting in the regular cannons. Once again, Annie sent a prayer to her mother and grandmother for pounding some smarts into her hard skull. ‘Keep your guns pointed at the biggest threat. That will be the open sea or the docks, so you might as well pay the extra fee and park the damned ship sideways and cover them both’. More than once, the Orca had fought off crews of other ships stranded in port from one mishap or another. She saw the logic in stealing a fine ship like Orca, she’d have tried the same if set adrift on land. But that didn’t stop her from firing a round of grapeshot to convince a few drunken idiots that there were easier ships to steal.
With all the low-level trash clans in town and the pirate crews drinking themselves to oblivion, it was only a matter of time until that happened. She’d ordered grapeshot in the cannons pointing landward and regular shot in those about to go eel hunting. Nothing broke up a charge like a half dozen sixteen-pounders skipping over the waves.
She tried one last time to get a good look at what she was seeing. Her spyglass gave her a view of the oncoming mass of seafood, but it had looked like they were chasing something with two legs. Whoever the unlucky Ocean Mage was, he was having a hard time of it, barely able to keep his stride. She expected he’d be eel food at any moment.
Her prediction was born out when another sighting showed no mage trying to skim over the waves. Instead, a small eel was out in front, the head and neck bobbing along in the water as it swam at them. The rest of the pack followed close behind. Annie didn’t have any fething clue about how eels picked their leaders. Maybe this one ate the Ocean Mage they were chasing and now commanded the rest? If so, she needed to splatter its brains first. Another bit of wisdom from her mom, ‘Shoot the Captain first, and the rest will squabble. But, if you know the Captain is an idiot, then shoot the first mate.’ She’d joked a few times with Stumpy that she’d taken her on as first mate because of her brains.
“Gunners one, three and five: Switch targets. I want that one in the lead dead. A night of drinks to the girl that mixes its brains with the waves!” The enthusiastic gunners immediately targeted the small eel at the front of the pack, waiting for it to come into sniping range. “Gunners two, four, and six. Fire!” The roar of three cannons firing could be heard through half the town. It was followed by other ships firing as well. One of those gunners also chose to target the lead eel with an eight-pound cannonball.
Stolen novel; please report.
Milo had expected that turning his cowl into an eel’s head would make him a target to the cannons he could see being pushed out from the ships. At the sound of the first blast, he split his mind into two parts, one trying to keep him running over the waves as the other half calculated the trajectory of the projectiles heading his way. While he was naturally good with that sort of problem, the task was made trivial with the perk: Keep all the Balls in the Air. Only one of the cannons had been fired at him, and it was going to hit ten feet to the left of him, then bounce into the mass of eels behind him.
One of those eels was an over-achiever and put on a surge of speed to catch up with the fleeing morsel in front of it. The eel wasn’t fooled at all by the new appearance of Milo’s cowl. The thing in front of him smelled like an enemy and was the assassin that had attacked and hurt the ancient one. The fifty-foot-long eel surged forward, its huge head reared up to breathe out a cloud of poisonous steam.
Milo knew he had death behind him, but the next volley of cannonballs had a lot more shots in it, including three from one ship that had targeted him exclusively. Hoping to sprint ahead of the eel wasn’t going to save him. Instead, he dove into the water to avoid both, kicking his legs as fast as he could. The three balls went over the top of the waves where Milo had been by only a foot, hitting the large eel just below the waterline and in the body near its overinflated lungs.
Poisonous steam exploded from the eel, killing a few smallish dragon snakes nearby and pushing a wave of poisonous water in all directions. Milo endured two nibbles by smaller eels as he swam and then was pushed forward faster by the wave. Coming in fast, he saw the first ship and decided to dive under it. While submerged, he changed his cloak to a dirty-brown color with a long tassel on the hood, a style favored by many dwarves. He clawed his way out of the water and up the hull of the next ship, leaping on deck to find no one aboard. The Sea Weasel was one of the ships that would never sail out of the harbor. She was slowly sinking from leaky seams and the crew only used her when they needed a place to sleep off a good drunk.
Milo scampered across a plank that led to the next ship just as the mass of eels arrived at the docks in hot pursuit.
Aboard the Iron Orca, the gunners on the regular cannon were loading for another round as the Steam Cannons began to fire, spraying out their deadly ammunition toward the mass of eels that seemed intent on chewing through one ship after another as they moved across the last rank of moored ships. Captain Annie’s intentions were made clear as she yelled out orders. “Target the biggest if you can, and the center of mass if you can’t. Don’t worry about the damned ships. If whoever owns those rotten boats gave a crap about them, they shouldn’t have parked them in our line of fire!”
That attitude seemed to be common as the Captains of the Barracuda, Sea Sleen, and Deadly Barnacle opened fire with their heavy weapons. The decision to fire on the pirate ships was an easy one for them. The Captains of the huge steam dreadnaughts of the Great Clans had already discussed clearing a channel in the harbor when they felt like leaving. That day had just come much earlier than expected with the benefit of an eel hunt.
Milo was determined not to be a casualty of the not-so-friendly fire coming from all around him. In addition to the big guns firing from the steamships, every bar had disgorged a gaggle of pirates and scavengers who weren’t about to miss a good fight. As soon as they got anywhere near the docks they began shooting with small pistols or hand cannons that most of them carried. The small arms fire had little effect on the eels but brought a round of curses from the gunners on the ships, along with a few return shots.
As he ran from ship to ship, Milo was joined by other sailors also seeing that standing and fighting wasn’t an option. Some foolishly climbed to a crow’s nest or into the rigging, but the eels were chewing through hulls in their frenzy to get to Milo, and their sheer weight was knocking smaller ships over. The fire from the cannons was quickly killing the mass of eels and destroying ships. The Iron Orca, in particular, was an engine of destruction. The gunners on the steam cannons were throwing out thousands of shots and wreaking havoc far beyond that of other ships. Captain Annie looked down and liked what she saw. “Keep firing until you’re down to 10% of a load. Let’s make sure everyone has a healthy fear of what happens if you piss off the Orca. And break out the best rum; I don’t want any thirsty gunners.”
Milo was near the end of the first row of ships. He’d considered doubling back, but that wasn’t going to be possible and would not have any effect on the battle. Eels were charging any ship that shot at them now, spreading out in his wake, and a few had even charged out of the water. Milo was surprised to see Squint happily carving up any eel that got onto land, leaping at them with no thought to personal safety, leaving that to his annoyed cats.
The last ship in line was much larger and better constructed than most pirate ships. Also better guarded. As he climbed over the rail, he was greeted by three well-muscled Scavengers with fancy beards, top hats, and monocles. Each also had a tattoo of a shark on one forearm and held weapons in both hands. Milo and the two pirates who were following him paused at the sight.
“Get your scurvy hides elsewhere, or you can suck a belly full of lead.” Behind them, Milo saw that twenty more scavengers in similar hats were loading heavy chests down into the cargo hold of the ship. Something about the hold’s curved, metal flooring looked wrong to Milo. The chests were being taken lower in the ship through a large metal hatch on the floor. Heads snapped around as the laborers saw strangers on deck, and weapons were drawn.
The two pirates paled. One apologized and dove back into the eel-infested water. The other charged, yelling, “Sharks?! Damned cheating scum!” Whether she would have made it to the three adversaries or not became a moot point as a gunner from another ship put a sixteen-pound cannonball bouncing across the deck, scattering bodies and knocking Milo down into the cargo hold where he lay stunned on the deck next to the opening.
A scavenger pointed a gun at his head, but before she could fire, several large eels attempted to reach their ancient enemy by the most direct route, slamming into the hull. Milo was sent flying again, this time into the lower hold, landing on a metal deck ten feet further down. The eels rocked the ship back and forth, dislodging the heavy hatch, which slammed down and locked behind him.
